NEW THINGS

It's been a long time. And there is a reason for that.

I have a new blog! taking what I started here and bringing it to the next level. If you have ever battled with insecurities or low self-worth like I have, you should subscribe to my new blog. I'm not an expert, but I'm in the same war as you are, and I'm here to help.

Thank you for following my adventures on Cape Cod. I am no longer there. This is a new season, with new possibilities.

http://findingselfblog.blogspot.com/

STAYING CURIOUS

Song for Today: "Brand New Shoes" by: Paolo Nutini

Every day is a new battle. Every moment is a choice. You can choose to feel one way or another about something. You can choose how you react regardless of your feelings. But sometimes, because of pride, or insecurities, or lack of understanding, our emotions get the best of us. My journey for the past 3 months has been a tough one. I've decided to conquer my insecurities. I've had dreams about being chased by some entity, and recently in those dreams I've begun to turn around and decide to fight. I feel like this is my brain's way of coping with the new way of thinking I've adopted. There are numerous strategies I've incorporated into my day to day living and my reactions, that have begun a shift in my emotions. One of those strategies is staying curious.

Curiosity is healthy, inherent, and humbling. Now, I'm not talking about being curious about drug abuse, or experimenting and getting weird sexually. God gave you wisdom for a reason. Use it. I'm talking about being willing to admit that you don't know everything, and feeling good about it. You have so many amazing experiences ahead of you! be humble enough to ask questions (this is also a great way to get to know people. People LOVE to talk about themselves). Being adventurous means different things to different people. Maybe you've never rented a movie from a Red Box machine, GO NUTS! Maybe you've never been on a zip line, HAVE FUN! Maybe you'd like to know what a five star restaurant is like, MODERATION! (seriously though, make sure you can afford it).

"Don't be impressed with your own wisdom. Instead, fear the LORD and turn away from evil"

-Proverbs 3:7 (NLT)

Explore! Learn! Go ask that girl to dance! Be the first one to sing karaoke! Try a new flavor of coffee! Inevitably you'll come across things you don't like, or things you're not good at, but don't worry about it! Now you know!

If you can't tell, I'm pretty excited about this. This revelation brought tremendous freedom and life to me. Especially in a place where everything is cold and dark (physically and spiritually). It also gave me the freedom to admit I'm a newbie at life, the humility to speak up about questions I have or things I've never heard of. And now, all of a sudden, I have no reason to be insecure because I'm excited to learn something new.

WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME?

Song for Today: "Open Arms" by: Elbow

When you're told something about yourself as a child, you tend to believe it even if it's a lie. And when you grow up being told a lie, that lie gets played over and over again in your head. It can limit you or prevent you from being who you were meant to be. It can hinder relationships, opportunities and even creativity. It can cause unnecessary stress and impossible expectations. It can leave you wondering "what's wrong with me?" I know I've spent a lot of time talking about insecurities, but if you are unaware of the root, than you are just pacifying the symptoms. Insecurities are unwarranted, unwelcome, and untrue.

"For I know the thoughts that I think towards you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope"

-Jeremiah 29:11

You have to confront the lie, call it a lie, and recognize that you actually are capable of great things. You have dreams, and maybe you wondered how it's possible that you could dream so big, because maybe you don't think you're capable. Realize that your up-bringing doesn't define you, what people say doesn't define you, you're self worth comes from within.

Awkwardness needs to flee because all of a sudden you are yourself, not what society tells you to be. Absent-mindedness needs to flee because your ideas are meaningful and potentially world-changing. And most of all, Insecurities need to flee because confidence is found within. When Christ lives in you, you are always capable of your full potential.

Don't use your past as an excuse, use it as a testimony. Start today. It's never too late to do something great! There's always hope. Just ask.

CONFIDENCE AND TRUTH

Song for Today: "I Am" by: Kirk Franklin

What is Confidence? And how do i get it? It's easy to appear confident. Well dressed, Smiling, Calm, Patient, all of these things are merely symptoms of confidence and easy to fake. It's like pretending you're sick when you're a kid to get out of school, you act the part, but when the thermometer comes out, so do the lies. Appearing calm, yet storming on the inside is not confidence. So I'm faced with the challenge of true confidence. Because honestly I don't feel confident all the time. Usually we feel the most confident when things are going our way, but that only lasts a moment and at the end of the day you have to face yourself. If your confidence is performance based, it will be a constant roller-coaster... there has to be more.

There's a belief that insecurities are a self-fulfilling prophecy. For instance, if you have a project to complete, but you feel insecure in your abilities, than you are no longer focused on the task at hand, but the reactions you're going to get when it's all said and done. On the other hand, when you are confident going into the project, all of a sudden you have energy, drive, passion for what's at hand, and you're excited to show off your abilities. There's a famous quote that goes like this: "If you think you can, or you think you can't, you're right".

I should mention here that I'm not talking about over confidence or pride. I learned that these characteristics have a repelling effect. Bragging, butting in, thinking overs are beneath you are not traits of true confidence. Proverbs tells us that Pride comes before a fall. We must be sober in our evaluation of ourselves. You see, when your self worth comes from outside sources, what society tells you, what people say about you, what car you drive, what job you have, how much money is in the bank, your current relationship status etc... You'll always be striving to please others, which will never satisfy you and only give you confidence when you're successful.

But when your self worth comes from within, you'll be confident even in the face of failure because you understand that life is a growing process and every failure is an opportunity to become better, and every success is proof of your growth. God has created each of us individually for a specific purpose and when we seek Him, He gives us our heart's desires (Psalm 37:4). Without Christ as your center, finding self-worth in the face of past hurts and failures is impossible. We have value because He paid the ultimate price for us when He died on the Cross. I'm not talking about a cross that hangs around the necks of hip-hop artists, I'm talking about an actual place, and an actual event in history that changed the path of the human race forever. And all it takes is believing in your heart and confessing with your mouth that Jesus is Lord. Recognize that without Him, there is no hope for salvation for me or for you. We are all imperfect and in need of a real savior. We all need refining. Today is your first step.

I'm only a product of His grace and refining. If you'd like to know more, I would be honored to answer any questions, or to just be there to listen. CONTACT me.

THINKING SOBERLY

Song for Today: "Mayfair Song" by: Air

What is an insecurity? It seems almost inevitable that imperfections, when pointed out, would make one insecure. And how do you tell the difference between someone just being a jerk, and something you should actually change? and what if it's something you CAN'T change? is it healthy to go around repeating mantras about how great you are? I believe in speaking life and not death, but I think everyone needs a dose of sober thinking about themselves.

That being said, no matter who you are, you have the potential for growth and leadership. We never stop growing as long as we are on earth. Thinking soberly about yourself is one thing, but using someone else as your standard is never a good idea. Everyone's strengths and weaknesses are different, and you will wear yourself out trying to be someone else. Be you, work on you, let them be them. I believe that insecurities come when we start comparing ourselves to others. This can be a hard habit to break, but freedom is available to everyone. When you accept Christ as the standard, you realize how futile comparisons are. That doesn't mean self-improvement is futile by any means, it simply means that you don't have to be perfect! AMAZING HUH?!?!